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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28309209">Dirty Little Secret</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/redtessa/pseuds/redtessa'>redtessa</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Banana Bus Squad, Gøøns (Podcast), The Goons Podcast - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drinking, Kissing, M/M, Secret Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 15:26:54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,045</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28309209</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/redtessa/pseuds/redtessa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He couldn’t take his eyes off him. He knew he was staring and if he wasn’t careful people were going to notice, but he just couldn’t help it. They had been keeping the relationship a secret from the guys. Smitty had been too shy to admit the truth when he first started hanging with the guys and as time went on the secret continued. It was one thing to make jokes about who was fucking who, and any conversation was full of innuendo, especially if John was involved. It was another thing altogether to admit that the jokes weren’t just jokes. Speaking of John, he was currently pressed between Smitty’s thighs sitting on the floor with his head leaned back in his lap, laughing about something. Smitty’s fingers running through the long white locks as he giggled about something the other had said.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Matt | blargmyShnoople/Smii7y (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Dirty Little Secret</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/thespottedowl/gifts">thespottedowl</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is a secret Santa gift from Discord. I hope they like it &lt;3<br/>I wrote this originally as a complete work and now i have other ideas so I am going to leave it open for more chapters but this can be read as a complete work. Depending on what happens next I may have to change the rating. Oh hell anyone who reads my stuff knows where this things going.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He couldn’t take his eyes off him. He knew he was staring and if he wasn’t careful people were going to notice, but he just couldn’t help it. They had been keeping the relationship a secret from the guys. Smitty had been too shy to admit the truth when he first started hanging with the guys and as time went on the secret continued. It was one thing to make jokes about who was fucking who, and any conversation was full of innuendo, especially if John was involved. It was another thing altogether to admit that the jokes weren’t just jokes. Speaking of John, he was currently pressed between Smitty’s thighs sitting on the floor with his head leaned back in his lap, laughing about something. Smitty’s fingers running through the long white locks as he giggled about something the other had said.</p><p> </p><p>That laugh and that smile were what had Matt so distracted. He wasn’t exactly jealous; they had talked over and over about the “strange” relationship Smitty had with John. Gotten to the point he could even tease the dark-haired boy about the fact he definitely had a “type” when it came to the boys he liked. Matt was just jealous he wasn’t the one currently pressed between those thighs. He took a sip from his drink, blinked his eyes and looked around the room, he needed to find someone to talk to, and stop staring.</p><p> </p><p>A large mass bumps into him, knocking Matt against the wall. Before he can even turn to see who it is, Anthony’s signature laugh gives him away. “So, you gonna tell him?” The big man drops a heavy arm across his shoulders almost knocking Matt’s drink from his hands. Laughing Matt leans back against Anthony’s side. “What? Tell who.. what?” Anthony makes a point of meeting his eyes and then turning his head to look over at where Smitty sits on the couch. He even nudges the side of Matt’s head, to turn his line of site.</p><p> </p><p>Anthony smirks. “I’m not dumb and neither are you Matt.” Matt glances over at the couch and realizes Johns climbed up into Smitty’s lap now, phone out and taking pictures. He sighs and goes to take another sip and realizes his drink his empty. Anthony takes one look at his face and grabs his arm. “Fuck. Ok. Let’s go get you a drink and then we can talk about the untalked about situation.” Stumbling along behind his captor, Matt glances back his eyes meeting Smitty’s for just a second. They exchange small smiles before he disappears into the crowd.</p><p> </p><p>Anthony reaches out and grabs a bottle from the bar as he pulls him along, down the hall into the small kitchen. Matt still can’t believe this room, Evan had convinced the Con and some sponsors to pay for a suit for him for the weekend, he was pretty sure it was bigger than his first apartment. The kitchen was this strange area off the hallway to one of the bedrooms. It was quiet back here and Matt couldn’t help but immediately relax hopping up on the counter and smiling over at Anthony.</p><p> </p><p>Anthony cracks the seal of the bottle of Gibson’s Finest in his hand and tosses the lid on the counter beside Matt. He takes a swig, makes face and squints at Matt as he holds the bottle out to him. “So how long you been crushing on the milk bag?” Matt sputters, having just started to taken a sip from the bottle. Anthony thumps him on the back and they both start laughing. Once he catches his breath, he takes another sip and hands the bottle back. “Its not like that Panda.” Anthony quirks an eyebrow at him and waits. “Fuck, its not just a crush dude. Goes back to almost before Youtube was a thing.”</p><p> </p><p>Matt leans back against the cupboard and remembers the first time he saw Smitty. The crowded high school hallway, the sounds of books hitting the floor and laughter. Every eye turned at the sound, and there he was, a short dark-haired kid with the biggest grin on his face, at a moment when most would be upset, he was laughing as a group of bigger older kids crowded around him. He doesn’t remember what Smitty said, some sarcastic dig at the guy who knocked his books probably. It was enough to settle the issue and have some of those same guys help him gather up his stuff. Lucky for Matt they had ended up with the next class together, he had made a point to get to know him and the rest was history.</p><p> </p><p>Anthony smiles and nods. “So? Does he know?” Matt blinks out of the memory, and his eyes meet Anthony’s. He doesn’t know what to say, he’s not that close to Anthony but he seems so sincere and Matt suddenly realizes he needs to say something. His voice is quiet and he knows he doesn’t sound like his usual self. “It's complicated.” Anthony nods and takes a step back so he can glance back towards the other room, then moves back close, he kind of nods his head and then turns back toward Matt. His voice is lower, quieter than Matt thinks he has ever heard him. “Ya, I get that. You know, no ones gonna judge you. I mean we all have stuff…” He pauses and takes a drink and fiddles with the bracelet on his wrist. “Complicated relationship come with the territory especially as a youtuber or semi famous person. There’s a shit tonne of judgement on everything we do, right?”</p><p> </p><p>Matt grabs the bottle and takes another drink. “Eh, whatever. You have a girlfriend, love of your life and all that and have nothing to hide.” Matts getting kind of drunk and kind of angry, he may have to call it a night soon or at least get away from here, before he says something that could mess this all up. Anthony snatched the bottle from his hand and sets it on the counter. His voice is filled with quiet anger. “Listen kid. I know all about keeping secrets and shit, ok. And if you really love him you need to tell him. You guys are good together, I’ve seen it” He puts a large hand on Matt's shoulder and smiles again. “Plus, in case you didn’t know, boys only got eyes for you, even when Johns in his lap.”</p><p> </p><p>Matt can’t help but smile at that. “Ya I know. Can I tell you a secret man? Like a life or death, you spill, I kill you kind of secret?” Anthony laughs and nods his head. “I’m fucking amazing at keeping secrets.” Matt’s torn but so tired of keeping this secret, he wants to be out with all their friends and not have to tiptoe around at certain events. He misses the way it feels to wrap his arm around Smitty’s shoulders while laughing and talking, hates always having to keep a distance because he knows if he is too close, he’ll do something to give them away. He just knows tonight would have been completely different if they were with the Goons and not the BBS guys.</p><p> </p><p>Matt grabs the bottle off the counter and takes a quick drink. He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, Anthony’s just watching him. “It's not just a crush, man. Its an actual thing but its just become a stupid secret and I fucking hate it.” Anthony just nods, leaning against the counter beside him. Matt swings his feet, boots thumping against the cabinet, he hands the bottle over and fiddles with his rings. It's quiet the noise and laughter making its way down the hall but muffled. Anthony clears his throat. “OK. Wait. Let me see if I understand. You guys are together?” Mat nods, waiting for the laughter. “Why the fuck is it a secret? You think, what? That we will hate or judge you guys?” He pushes off from his leaning position to stand in front of Matt. “Fuck you man. You need to actually open your eyes and ears. Jesus.”</p><p> </p><p>Taking a deep breath, Matt lifts his eyes from his rings to watch as Anthony starts to pace around the small space. Matt can tell he is actually pissed now. Not about the relationship, but about the secret and its cause. “No one out there gives a shit who any one else is fucking. Jesus Christ I should knock both your heads together.” This quiet anger from Anthony is something new. “Matt, whose suite are we in?” “Evans? I mean it's crazy how big it is for one guy but hey he’s Vanossgaming and Rynx so like people wanted him here, right.” Anthony smirks and shakes his head. “Ya he is. So, let's ask you another question. Do you know where I’m staying?”</p><p> </p><p>Matt shrugs, usually the guys all stay in the same hotel on the same floor but he hasn’t seen Anthony around much this weekend so has no idea. “Like I said I’m good at keeping secrets too. We are staying here.”  “Cool man, nice of him to share some of this amazing room with you guys.” Anthony smirks. “Matt. You’re a fucking idiot.” “Fuck off!” Matts staring at Anthony trying to figure out why he is an idiot. “1+1= what Matt? Come on do I need to spell it out?” It's like a light goes off in the back of Matt's head. “Oh, wait what? You and Evan? What about your girlfriend?” Anthony rocks on his feet and smiles sticking his hands in his pockets. “Her too. Maybe I should say 2+1=?” He smirks and laughs.</p><p> </p><p>Matts reeling, this is not the conversation he ever expected to have tonight. He is left speechless and that doesn’t happen often. “Do, do the guys know?” Anthony laughs, shrugs and nods. “Some do, some ignore it. It’s a non secret kind of secret. Kept it quiet for a long time, but after a while people started to pick up on stuff and we aren’t good at keeping our hands to ourselves. Spend any time with us, you’ll notice stuff too.” He grabs Matt's shoulder. “So, here’s what you’re gonna do, go out there and get your boy.”  He pulls him off the counter hard, they both stumble at the sudden move. Matts boots sliding on the tile floor and the alcohol making them wobble, and Matt crashes against Anthony’s chest. There’s the sound of someone clearing their throat and they pull away and spin to see who it is.</p><p> </p><p>Smitty’s standing in the doorway, hands in his pockets, he leans against the wall and smirks. “Did I interrupt something?” Mat jumps back away from Anthony. “No. Nothings going on just talking.” He blushes, long fingers running over his face then up to fix his hair. Anthony laughs and starts to leave the room. “Just talking to your boy here Smit. He’s a little drunk, you should take him back to your room.” He nudges Smitty’s shoulder as he leaves to walk back to the party. He leans closure before he walks past and whispers. “He’s got it bad for you. Stop hiding, you stupid fuck.” Smitty has to stop his jaw from flopping open, dark eyes watching the older man step out the door.</p><p> </p><p>Matt turns and grabs the bottle off the counter, and takes a swig. His mind is racing, between his current feelings about his own secrets and now with Anthony’s in his head. He just can’t look at Smitty right now. Smitty moves across the small space, he hooks a hand around Mats hip and rests his head on his opposite shoulder. “Was it something I did?” Matt shakes his head. He squeezes Matts hip and turns to lean against the counter. Matt stares at the cabinet in front of him, he just doesn’t want to meet his eyes yet. “Matt? You mad at me?” Smitty’s voice is quiet. Matt shrugs his shoulders.</p><p> </p><p>Smitty looks up and watches Matt, he is still staring straight ahead like he doesn’t want to meet his eyes. Matt is quiet, he hasn’t said a word since he walked in the kitchen, Matts never quiet. He turns and hops up on the counter where Matt had been sitting earlier. Smitty reaches out and hooks a thumb in one of Matt's belt loops tugging him over in front of him. “Hey?” He reaches out and wraps his other hand around Matts forearm, thumb slowly rubbing circles on the skin of his arm. “Talk to me?” Matt slowly releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding in. “Smit, why don’t you want them to know about us?” He still hasn’t met Smitty’s eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Matt starts to take another drink from the bottle, but Smitty pulls it from his hand, takes a drink and then puts it on the counter. “What brought this on? I thought we were on the same page?” Matt shakes his head and reaches out and squeezes his knee, hand then sliding up Smitty’s thigh. Moving Smitty's knee to the side he steps forward until his hips are between his thigh’s eyes downcast, he watches the way Smitty’s thigh muscles tense under his touch. “Smit, I don’t want to be the dirty little secret anymore.” Matt finally looks at Smitty, a shy small frown on his face as his eyes roam over his face. “I love you and don’t care who knows it. I want to be the one in your lap, not John. Can you flip the fucking page?”</p><p> </p><p>Smitty runs his hands up and down Matts arm. “Matt? You’re not a dirty little secret. You never have to be jealous of John, you know that right?” Matt sighs. “This isn’t just about John.” Matt leans in, he runs a hand up Smitty’s arm. He presses a kiss to Smitty’s forehead. Eyes slipping closed Smitty whispers “I love you Matt. Don’t care who knows it.” Matt slides his hand around his neck up, to under his jaw , Smitty leans in and presses forward into the touch. Everything seems to go quiet around them, they are in their own little world. Their lips meet with a soft kiss.</p><p> </p><p>The kiss slowly deepens, mouths fitting together, Matt’s thumb brushes along Smitty’s jaw, he wraps his fingers around his throat and slowly squeezes as he licks his way into his mouth. Smitty’s tongue meets his with a soft sweep. Matt tightens his hand a bit more around his throat and a quiet moan slip’s from Smitty’s throat. He grabs a fist full of Matts shirt to pull him even closer. Smitty wraps his legs around Matt's hips, hands making there way onto his shoulders and then into his hair, nails scratching across his scalp, sending sparks through his body. Matt growls and releases his hold on his throat, hand sliding to Smitty's lower back, pulling him closer to the edge of the counter. </p><p> </p><p>Matt is pressed tight against Smitty, large hands roam over his body, wrapping around his hips to hold him in place. Being pressed against each other like this isn’t unfamiliar but the fact they are in some else’s hotel room, with a group of their friends in the next room is new. This same group of friends who don’t even know they are a couple. They slowly pull apart to breath, foreheads resting against each other. Matt chuckles and presses a kiss to the side of Smitty head, then pulls back to look him in the eyes. “Fuck it.” He moves back in and Smitty’s expecting another kiss but Matt ducks his head to the side. Smitty’s eyes flutter closed and he makes a small sound when Matt kisses the side of his neck right behind his ear.</p><p> </p><p>Matt whispers “I love you.” Into his skin and then moves to the other side, finding that place over Smitty pulse that makes his knees weak, he licks, and sucks until Smitty whines and grabs his hips pulling him closer. Matt rocks against Smitty when he feels his cock throbbing through his jeans, just like his. Matt bites down on his neck hard enough to leave a mark, Smitty's head tips back and thuds against the upper cabinet. He whines. “Fuck, Matt” Matt pulls away from his neck and looks at Smitty, eyes dark and smirk dangerous. “The things I could do to you Smitty. Right here where anyone could walk in.” Smitty whimpers. Matt kisses him, hard and insistent, Smitty almost helpless to whatever Matt wants to do to him.</p><p> </p><p>Smitty’s hands find their way to Matts hips pulling him in, grinding against him.  He realizes they must have been kissing longer than he thought as they both pull away, panting to catch their breath when they break apart. Matt smirks again, dirty and smug, he drags a hand down Smitty’s back to his ass and squeezes. And then he is stepping back and Smitty’s watching him, pupils blown wide in lust, he readjusts the bulge in his jeans. “I really want to fuck you right here, make you scream my name and let everyone know your mine.” Smitty obviously swallows and nods. “But I don’t think that’s the coming out story either of us want?” The smirk on his face makes Smitty giggle and slowly he nods, and reaches a hand out.</p><p> </p><p>Matt takes his hand dragging him off the counter and into his arms. Long arms wrapping around Smitty’s shoulders, Smitty’s arms sliding around his waist and pressing his face into Matts chest. They both pause for a second enjoying the moment. Matt takes a deep breath and pulls away, he gives Smitty’s hand a squeeze and turns to walk out. Smitty grabs his sleeve “Matt? What if…” Matt turns and grabs his hand. “If they can’t handle it fuck ‘em.” Leaning in he presses a soft kiss to Smitty’s cheek, running a thumb over the marks now on his neck. Smitty has to catch himself from just dragging Matt back to what they were doing. He squeezes his hand and they walk down the hall, hand in hand together bringing their dirty little secret out of the dark.</p>
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